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Relationships is the third episode of Season 2 of Letterkenny.


Wayne doubles down on finding love.

Cold Open[]


Letterkenny Season 2 - Squirrely Dan's Relationship

You're huckin' the ball around with your pals the other day…” — Wayne

Wayne, Dan, and Daryl are playing catch with a baseball. Dan talks about taking his date to the chip truck. They remark on the unavailability of various foods in the United States. Dan doesn't like to kiss and tell, but "the Frenchins took a hard left turn" from which he had yet to recover— the gal suggested some attentions paid to his butthole. Dan admits it felt good and natural. Wayne and Daryl stop throwing the ball to him and try to ignore him.

Well it's impolite to kiss and tell. — Wayne

Plot Summary[]

Katy prepares pancakes for Wayne's birthday, as per tradition, although Wayne thinks it conflicts with another tradition:

We don't make a thing of birthdays in this family. — Wayne

Katy tells him she has arranged for a matchmaker, since he doesn't like online dating and MoDean's is gone.

The conversation turns to Jivin' Pete's testicles and his botched vasectomy, and the group compares them to various fruits and vegetables. They assert that he is a good guy, however.

Jonesy and Reilly, sitting in the Jeep, want to skip practice. In declaring their hatred of the other players and what they would do to them at practice, however, their interest is renewed. "It might be a fun praccy after all."

Katy brings the matchmaker from "Goldilocks and the Three Dates" to meet Wayne in the barn. Wayne is reluctant to talk about himself and eventually storms off, though Katy fills in some details. Dan and Daryl tease Wayne about the service.

Stewart interrupts them to ask whether Katy has noticed that he has stopped talking to her; he has stopped communicating with her because he is upset with her. The hicks are contemptuous of the "silent treatment," and Wayne hucks the baseball at Stewart as he walks off.

Wayne goes on his first date, with a psychologist and feminist named Kim, at Four Dancers Resto Bar east of town. They encounter Glen, who is working as a "waitress" there. She observes him crossing his arms and gives a psychological explanation, then questions him about feminism. She is intrigued by him, and tells him she wants to talk about his feelings, but Wayne calls the matchmaker.

This one's too hard. — Wayne

Stewart, Epi-pen drawn, approaches Devon and the other Skids in the parking lot of the dollar store. Stewart suggests they game together, but Devon demurs, and when Stewart walks off, he throws a soccer ball at him.

Wayne goes on his second date, to the Super Scoops ice cream truck upcountry with Lisa. Glen is also working there. His date is a preschool principal who assumes, incorrectly, that Wayne like kids, because "everyone likes kids." She describes how she hugs the children to discipline them; Wayne suggests smacking them, which shocks her. He also opposes sitting, because it makes them soft. His date pretends to receive an emergency call, and departs. Wayne calls the matchmaker again.

This one's too soft. — Wayne

Stewart comes to the farm and stands next to Katy on the porch, sighing, but does not initiate conversation. He explains that he has been giving her the silent treatment, but she does not take the bait, and calmly explains how to have an adult conversation. She breaks up with him, saying he was a rebound, even though there was no "physical rebounding," and she has no time for the silent treatment. Daryl and Dan, who are throwing a baseball while Stewart and Katy are talking, threaten Stewart with it. He dodges it, but Daryl hits him with the baseball when he turns again.

Wayne's third date is with Angie at the chip truck. Glen shows up as well, but as a customer, not an employee. Angie asks to "talk" in his truck. Later, as the Hicks are gathered at the produce stand, he declines to talk about the encounter, as it is not polite to kiss and tell. The conversation turns to an extended discussion of how porn actors vocalize.

Jonesy and Reilly sit in the parking lot and recount taking out their hostility on their teammates at practice.

Praccy's not bad when you're donkin'. — Reilly

Stewart returns to the parking lot where the Skids have gathered. He and Devon dance off, and Devon crowns him with his bowler hat, signifying his return as head of the Skids.


  • Wayne: Even though I clean my ears, sometimes a tater'll just roll out of there unexpected.
  • Wayne: What sort of potent peace pipe was some prick pulling off when he titled tomatoes "fruits"?
  • Jonesy: Why even praccy?
    Reilly: Like, I'm just gonna praccy like a donkey.
    Jonesy: I could donk all day.
    Reilly: Just blast clappers at the hash marks at the fuckin' plug tendy of ours.
    Jonesy: Clappys from the hashys, buddy.
    Reilly: Just steppin' into one from the ladies' tees.
    Jonesy: Just bulldoze that speed bump.
    Reilly: Just firin' ringers at his ears.
    Jonesy: Just firin' warm-up ringers.
    Reilly: Just tossin' chest-high sauce at the boys.
    Jonesy: Just tossin' ankle-high rocket sauce.
    Reilly: Just tossin' mad sui's up the middle.
    Jonesy: Just tossin' mad sui's through the trolley tracks.
    Reilly: Just tossin' mad breakout sui's directly into the skates.
    Jonesy: Just tossin' mad breakout sui's.
    Reilly: You know, it might be a fun praccy after all.
    Jonesy: I could donk all day, boys.
  • Matchmaker: I don't think I've ever sat on a hay bale before.
    Wayne: That's a straw bale. And that's barley.
  • Dan: Wait. So, you're upsets with her, and you wanna communicate that by not communicatings?
    Stewart: Acutely.
    Wayne: You are spare parts, aren't you, bud?
  • Kim: Feminism is the belief that women and men should have equal rights and opportunities. So, are you a feminist, Wayne?
    Wayne: Well, I trust my sister with just about any job under the sun over a man. But, 'cept this one, I guess.
  • Lisa: You think sitting is a problem?
    Wayne: Yeah.
    Lisa: Why?
    Wayne: 'Cause it makes you soft.
    Lisa: Literally or figuratively?
    Wayne: Well, both, I suppose.
  • Katy: No one has time for the silent treatment, Stewart. Not even in Letterkenny.
  • Reilly: Half these guys wheel their fuckin' bags into the rink. The day I fuckin' wheel my bag into the rink is the day I stop playing hockey.

Running Gags[]

  • Jinx, you owe me a Coke
  • Jivin' Pete's nuts
  • Wayne hates kids
  • Just kidding, I don't give a fuck


According to Tunefind, the following songs are featured in this episode:

  • Fame by Annakin Slayd
  • Take It to Fantastic by Cannonball Jane
  • Never Forever by Dead Soft
  • Blue Gowns by Blue Hawaii
  • Raptor by Rustie
  • Lost in the Sauce by Blondtron & Waspy